Wednesday, December 31, 2008


I think this was my craziest year yet.  

We were looking at pictures last night and I found a drawing I made in the hospital.  Originally I'd had tally marks on the white board for each day I was going to be in the hospital.  It was comforting to erase one mark every day.  It helped me see that my time away from my family would come to an end.  Then the marks were all gone, and they wouldn't deliver the babies.  There was no room for them in the nicu!!

The next two days were really hard.  ....until I drew myself a picture of my family waiting at home for me.  So, left to right, that's Delightful Finch, Strong Bear, Beautiful Rabbit, and Sexy Haqon.  I missed them sooo much while I was inpatient.

It's been almost a year since I started this blog....since I found out I was pregnant...since I found out we were having twins...since Finch started walking!  Our prayers have become simpler this year.  We're thankful for simpler things like our house and Sexy's job and each other.  We ask for simpler breathing efficiently.

I can't believe Angel and Seraph are 6 months old.
I wish Seraph could be home with us again.  I'm glad we got to have the twins together for a few days.  

Seraph is on cpap to help her breath right now.  They just inserted a pic-line (like a permanent IV) to use instead of poking her when they have to draw blood for labs.  (they test her blood gases a couple times every day to make sure she's getting enough respratory support.)

I look forward to next Summer when we'll all be playing together at the park or by the lake or just walking around with the strollers. Angel will be crawling or walking.  Seraph will be crawling or sitting up.  Finch will have an even better vocabulary.  Rabbit will be jumping, dancing, and spinning.  Bear will be shouting "look at me" as he climbs.  Sexy and I will be smiling....and we'll all be very happy.

Hope you and yours have a great 2009 ;)

Friday, December 26, 2008

The Day After...

Sexy Haqon drove off this morning for his one-day-work-week.

Beautiful Rabbit is playing Oregon Trail on the computer. Angel is sleeping.

Bear, Finch, and I just spent a few hours playing in the snow. We shoveled from our front door to our neighbor's front door and their neighbor's front door. It made a nice little maze for the kids to play in. Then we had a snowball fight:
Bear: haha - I got you, Mom!
Mom: Aaaaaahhh!
Bear: Do you wanna throw a snow ball, Mom?
Mom: Ya! I'm gonna throw a snow ball at Finch!
Bear: No!! [Bear ran in front of Finch and blocked her with his body. Then he waved his arms all around to make an extra "shield" for her.]
Mom: Are you protecting your sister?
Bear: Ya! You can't get her!

Seraph's right lung already looked a lot better on this morning's x-ray. They're going to give her a spontaneous breathing trial later today.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Seraph Update

They intubated her again.  They felt she was working too hard to get her oxygen.  The x-ray on her right lung was cloudy.  They put the tube back in and added some meds to take some of the work off of her heart.  They'll be watching her closely and hope to take the tube back out in 3-4 days.

Merry Christmas!!

Seraph is happy.  She's alert and active.  She has lots of cool Christmas presents.  Rabbit was thrilled to hold her.

Angel slept in late!  She was the last one up, and slept 45 minutes later than she ever has.  The kids played with their santa presents until she 
woke up.  Then we opened
the rest of the presents.  Everyone had fun :)

Delightful Finch.  I think she's liked every present. 
 But the one she won't put down
 was this doll from her cousin.  It's adorable!  It makes little baby sounds.  She was too busy dancing with her baby to hold still for a picture.

Strong Bear. This poor kid's been asking to open the christmas presents every day since we put them up on the cupboards.  He's running around crazy with chocolate and candy straws.

Beautiful Rabbit's been trying to guess her present.  She didn't guess, but her eyes almost popped out when she opened her purple scooter!

Now we're watching Wonder Woman (Haqon hasn't seen  them and I LOVED it when I was Finch's age).  Some of these I don't remember. I threw in a pot roast for dinner.  It smells fantastic.

It's snowing like crazy.  We love you guys - hope everyone's having a Merry Christmas :)

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Seraph Update

They took out her breathing tube this morning!  She woke up and gave me an earful.  She sobbed as she told me about her whole week in her tiny voice.  When she was done, the tears stopped and she just looked around.  She liked sitting up (with support).  She seems stronger and more alert than last time.  They'll start weaning her oxygen tomorrow.  She won't be home in time for Christmas...but she will be home soon.  She's looking good :)

[Seraph (left), Angel (right)]

Monday, December 22, 2008

Good Night, Bear

3 weeks ago:
Mom: Good Night, Bear.
Bear:  Stay here with me, Mommy!
Mom: OK

Dad: Good Night, Bear.
Bear: I love you, Daddy.  I love you Mommy.
Mom: Good Night, Bear
Bear: Bye.
Bear:  Finch is jumping!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Welcome to Winter

Bonus points to the first person to bring me an invincible summer!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008


Nintento fixed our Wii!!  (no, I didn't win the contest).  Our Wii was broken when......SOMEONE fed it a handful of plastic beads.  I tried to fix it myself (sniff sniff).  Finally I logged on to Nintendo's website and
 discovered it was still under warranty.  They sent me a shipping label and I sent it back.  They got it in the mail Friday, replaced the broken part, and shipped it back that same day!

Amazing! It didn't cost me a penny.

My kids are playing with Rabbids again :)
er...Strong Bear is hoarding the game, but that's OK so far.
Delightful Finch jumped down from the dinner table to dance!  She started singing this song.  ...and it was so cute, I couldn't bring myself to make her come back to dinner.  
Seraph - no changes, no real news.  They've ruled out RSV.  They're watching her decreased heart function very closely.  They still don't know if it'll get better.  It's just too soon to tell.....but that's the part that worries us the most.

Aside from missing her, we're all doing well.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Back to the Hospital

Saturday was heavenly.  I can't remember the last time we were all so happy.  Everything felt right.  We celebrated with chocolate cake!  

Sunday was an adventure.  Seraph visited 2 different hospitals to get her feeding (NJ) tube replaced.  It was frazzling, but worth it.

Monday was a little troubling.  Seraph had a slight fever and seemed kinda puffy.  She seemed less agitated though, and slept well through the night.

Tuesday.  Seraph had a high fever in the morning.  She is back at the hospital now.  They're working on bringing her fever down.  Her cardiologist is worried because she seems to have decreased heart function that may or may not return to normal once her fever is gone.  She seems to have an infection.  They had to re-intubate her.

I'm not sure what will happen next.  It seems she'll be at the hospital for a while.  antibiotics and etc.

She was really passive this morning.  Later she started moving/looking around more.  Her color is better - more pink.  

We miss her.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Seraph & Angel

I don't even know where to start.  Angel likes watching her sister.  She seems to recognize her or atleast really like watching her.

We've already had to take Seraph back to the hospital once - to replace her NJ tube.  They can only place it while they're taking an X-ray. She was home after a few hours.  She had a fever today, but she's pulling out of it.  She has meds every 4 hours.  

It's been crazy.  really crazy...but my whole family is happier.  We're smiling.  We're hugging.  We're dancing like crazy chipmunks.  It's nice.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Tomorrow, Tomorrow. I love you, Tomorrow...

It's only a day away!

They wanted to keep her overnight to make sure they got her meds just right.  The discharge nurse called today to get things set up.  I already had everything ready!  We'd planned on having Seraph come home today.  So, I cleaned a bit so I wouldn't just be sitting here all day.  Mom, if you're reading this, don't be shocked when you walk in and my house looks clean!  Er....actually the kids'll have had time to mess it up by then...

We had waffles for dinner.  Cinnamon waffles with peaches on top.  Beautiful Rabbit thought it was the best dinner ever.  Clean house and best dinner ever.  I'm doing pretty good!
Me:  Seraph is going to come live at our house tonight!
Strong Bear: Can we open the [Christmas] presents?

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Seraph Coming Home :)

Yep, she's coming home this weekend!   Her stats look good.  They've weaned her down to 1/4 liter oxygen.  She's going to come spend Christmas with us!  

I told Strong Bear that Seraph is going to come live at our house again.  He smiled and jumped up and down.

Seraph still has some reflux problems.  But the doctors want her to heal up...and have a wonderful Christmas.  We can worry about the reflux stuff some other time.

In other news.....Angel went to see a physical therapist today.  Months ago, she had a flat spot on the right side of the back of her head.  It's a lot better than it was, but the doc was still concerned.  PT gave us some stretches to work on....but it's pretty much corrected itself.  We've been working hard to keep her off her back.  It's paying off!  I'm sooo happy. The PT was especially impressed with how well she did with tummy time.

It was nice to show Angel off a bit.  She was smiling and cooing during the whole appointment.  I'd been worried about her appointment.  I'm very proud of her for doing so well.

Picture: Gpa & Angel

Angel loves her Grandpa.  She's learned the secret-ninja-baby trick to getting him to pick her up.  While I can't divulge her ninja secrets, I can tell you that she smiles when she sees him and likes to nap in his arms while  he reads books.  

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Magpie Musing's Wii Fit Contest GiveAway

Magpie Musing is giving away a Wii Fit! It comes with a wii console and the wii fit board.  So, if you're interested, go check out her contest here. (Thanks, Safire, for pointing it out) Basically you're supposed to post a fitness story on your blog about how the wii fit would change your life and link back to her blog.  So here's my hopeful entry:

A fitness story.  

Once upon a time.......we packed up all our stuff and moved into a bigger house.  I'd never been big on fitness, but my new neighbor was a total fitness nut.  She gets up early to work out each morning before her day starts.  She bikes around the park for fun!  She teaches weight training and aerobic classes.  Somehow we hit it off and she started dragging me to early morning runs at the high school track.  She even started working out an hour early twice a week so she could be back in time watch my (sleeping) kids so my hubby and I could run over to the gym  before work. (My dear hubby walks too fast and I walk to slow, so side-by-side treadmills are perfect for us!)  Then she introduced me to Bikram (hot) Yoga. My stress level went way, way down.

My mom used to do yoga in our front room when I was a kid.  Sometimes she'd let me do it with her.  My favorite part was that bit at the end where you're just relaxing. Bikram Yoga was everything I liked about yoga PLUS a relaxing sauna. (and our water heater at home was broken at the time!) I felt so warm and cozy and sure of myself.  No one seemed to care how big my tummy was or how long I could balance or how far I could stretch.  

My youngest was 10 months.  I was some 30 lbs too heavy.  Those extra pounds started melting off.  I felt great.  More energy. More smiles.  More drive. More clothes that fit. It was great!

Then one week it all disappeared.  My wonderful neighbor was hit with a messy divorce out of no where. She moved.  I found out I was pregnant.  Twins.  Identical twin girls.  All my new fitness plans stopped dead. I spent the last 6 weeks of my pregnancy in the hospital.

One of the twins was born with a heart defect. Now she's the one spending time in the hospital.  My secret to staying sane with one twin in and out of the hospital?  Chocolate.  Cake.  Brownies.  Add Skittles, Twizzlers, & Sweettarts for variety, but it's mostly the chocolate that helps. The twins are 5 months old now, and I'm some 60 lbs too heavy. Seraph is coming home from the hospital this weekend (yay!)!  

Except for doctor's appointments, I'm pretty much stuck in my house until RSV season is over.  Stuck inside with twins...and a 2 yr old girl...and a 3 yr old boy. Thank goodness my 8 yr old (girl) gets to go out for school.  We're all brimming with stress...and stuck in the house.

I'd like to be one of those people who gets through stress with exercise.....I've been thinking about introducing my 8-yr-old daughter to yoga.  Yoga is so good for stress.   And I remember how good it felt to do Yoga with my mom.

Only.....I've done Yoga, but I don't really know how to do it on my own.  The Wii Fit would be perfect!  It would change my life!  So, Magpie - pick me pick me pick me!!! :)

Monday, December 8, 2008

Seraph Leaves the PICU

Seraph was transfered out of the PICU(Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) today!  Yay!  They have lots of plans for her, but all of them focus on getting her home and keeping her out of the icu.  Yay!  Way to go, girlie :)

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Picture: Angel & Seraph

Seraph squirmed too much for pictures, today.  She's very happy.  I think she knows she's almost ready to leave the ICU.  Beautiful Rabbit loved holding Seraph.  

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Growing up too Fast

My sweet little Angel is growing up too fast.  I can't believe she's already 5 months old.  I'm still trying to catch my breath!

Angel is my cute little smiley girl.  She is very social. Finch and Bear often vie for her attention.  Bear even pushes her around in her toy saucer when Mom isn't looking.  (He wanted to show her the Christmas tree).

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Seraph Update

The newest projections have her coming home in 2 weeks.  They're tweaking her diuretics and then she has one more minor (scope) surgery - tacking her small intestine to her abdominal wall where it's a little too twisted.

She was happy today.  She loves it when she gets to be in her swing.  She's been smiling more lately...and she will be home for Christmas :)  

All I Want for Christmas?

Perfection!  Is that too much to ask? I was surprised to learn Sexy Haqon and I differ in our views on the perfect Christmas gift. Obviously, Christmas is the perfect time to buy that practical gift that we've been putting off because of money or time issues.  See - I'm easy to shop for because I put off buying things that I want in order to stick to the budget.

Haqon sees Christmas as a time to show how well you know someone by choosing the one gift that's deeply personal; a reflection of every aspect of your friendship.  Wow.  I think my gifts have been falling flat.  Sorry, Sexy.

I'm more of a "oh, I think he'd like that" or "oh, I think this would make his life easier" kind of gal.

Sexy Haqon and I stayed up late wrapping presents.  I was grumpy.  My family is doing the "draw names" thing for Christmas this year.  I thought it would be easier, but in a lot of ways it's just been a grumpy mess.  In the midst of it all, I looked down at Baby Angel on the floor.  She was kicking the wrapping paper with her feet.  She was wearing the biggest (wet) smile her face could hold.  That's my perfect Christmas right there on my Angel's face.

It has very little to do with gifts.  I want to enjoy a little happiness with my family and friends.  So I revised my perfect Christmas:
-Wake up and open presents at home
-then eat breakfast (muslix that we made the night before as a family...everyone getting their own tupperware to add in the perfect mix of the fruit they want)
-drive to grandma's house where we meet up with all our siblings that are in town (without exchanging gifts)
-play card games/board games all day long and into the night -- stopping only to make turkey or (in the dream world) lamb sandwhiches when we get hungry.
-using Skype on Gpa's laptop to spend time with family that's far away
-calling other family on the phone because we love them and want to wish them well.

oh, and no one is sick in my dream world Christmas, so I don't have any worries about the twins and rsv or hospitalization.  My kids run themselves silly with their cousins without actually breaking anything or making a mess that's too big to clean.

(When we're richer and not bound by the distance from Seraph's Cardiologist, we'd like to spend some of our Christmas holidays at Haqon's brothers' houses.)

It's hard enough to get the perfect gift for my own kids and I spend 18 hours a day with them!  I still can't think of anything Strong Bear would like more than the cardboard tube the wrapping paper comes I wrapped it up and tossed it on the pile of gifts!  I may not know my extended family well enough to pick out the perfect gift, but I do love them enough to want to spend Christmas playing with them all day long.

And that sounds perfect.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Portabellopixie's Pick a Pattern Contest!

My favorite Hullabaloo fabric designer is having a contest on her blog.  Please click here to vote for your favorite pattern. I love the blue set they picked :)

They're doing gift boxes, storage boxes, and basket liners. Go vote!


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